239...

...Cals for the day! Haha, almost had ya :P you don't get to know just yet ;) too ashamed to tell you my weight =/

So, I'm done for the day. I feel like a pig. My cals have not been higher than 370 in 10 days. And not higher 300 in 7. I have been in negative net cals many of those days. I'm sure I am today too, but only with general activity and BMR. Blah. Must get to the gym. Or at least get my ass on the wii or something! Something that if I fricken pass out, I'm at home and don't get banned from the gym, heh. I could pull it off if that happened, bc I'm fat, but whatever.

- 872 Thursday.
-150 Wednesday.
155 Tuesday.
-1130 Monday.

So, 3 out of 5 days were -net cals. And not too bad intake on the other too. I guess that's ok.. but it still feels like I should be doing *more* :s

I tend to keep losing during my period. Then gain when I'm done. What's WITH that??? No binges this time around, so far though. Too damn scared. I'm glad I'm scared. I NEED to be scared. Look at what I fucking did to myself. Maybe I'll post some pics of what I used to look like... Like, I'm ugly, I can't change that.. So I might scare you.. but I can change my weight, my body.

Hmmm. Dare I be brave? Lol.