Wintergirls Quote...

I'm going to start typing up some quotes from the current book that I'm reading - and I'll go back through some that I've read and pluck quotes out of those, when I have time. These can be used as thinspiration, they are for me!  

This is an excerpt from; Wintergirls, by Laurie Halse Anderson:

        Adrenaline kicks in when you're starving. That's what nobody understands. Except for being hungry and cold, most of the time I feel like I can do anything. It gives me superhuman powers of smell and hearing. I can see what people are thinking, stay two steps ahead of them. I do enough homework to stay off the radar. Every night I climb thousands of steps into the sky to make me so exhausted that when I fall into bed I don't notice Cassie.                              Then suddenly it's morning and I leap onto the hamster wheel and it starts all over again.

-I was going to stop here... but this page speaks to me and for some reason I have to include the next few paragraphs. (My quotes will usually be shorter! Unless you like them long! Lol).-

   Five hundred calories a day is working. Truth = 94.00.   Another goal weight. W00t.   I should be diamond sparkly champagne shooting to the stars, but the loudspeaker between my ears crackles on, full volume, with another goal: 85.00, 85.00, 85.00.      85.00 is dangerland. 85.00 is Fourth of July fireworks in a small metal box.
   The second time they locked me up admitted me for my own good, my whole body, including my skin, my hair, my baby blue toenails, and all my teeth weighed 85.00: 10.00 pounds of fat, 75.00 pounds of everything else.    
   Wreaths of pus-coloured fat were suffocating my thighs, butt and my belly, but they couldn't see them. They said my brain was shrinking. Electrical storms were lighting up the inside of my skull. My tired liver was packing her suitcase. My kidneys were lost in a sandstorm.

•    85.00 was not enough stuffing for a paper Lia girl.

• 85.00 was skin that wanted to shed.

• 85.00 was fluffy monkey hair growing all over to keep me warm.   

They said I had to get fatter. 

I told them my goal was 80.00 and if they wanted my respect, they'd better stop lying to me.       

When my brain started working again I checked their math. Someone made a mistake because they didn't figure in the snakes in my head and the thick shadows hiding inside the cage of my ribs. 

        85.00 is possible. I've been there before, in dangerland, sweet buzzing high gingersmoke air crafty trolls hiding under bridges.   But 85.00 makes me want 75.00. To get there I'll need to crack open my bones with a silver mallet and dig out my marrow with a long-handled spoon. 

She's so right too... If at 85 lbs, she was only 10 lbs of 'fat', if you can call it that! Then at 75, there would be no fat left to lose... All the muscle was probably already gone by then.... She'd have to scrape out her bone marrow, or more realistically, wait for her body to eat her organs from the inside out, and one by one, they'd pack their bags and leave just like her liver threatened. And this is our lives ladies... sad, but true... because we think we're going to be SO happy at that ultimate goal, but we often get there and wonder where the hell the happiness is at?? Did it get lost along the way?? Is it late arriving?? Did we miss it altogether?? OR do we just need to be that *few* lbs thinner for it to finally show up? What number will I be happy at? What number will you be happy at?


"How many pounds til I'm happy? How many pounds til I'm thin? Three more pounds til I'm skinny, three more pounds and I win!"


I see that quote all over the net, but no one writes who it's quoted from... Just in case anyone wants to know... It's from Second Star to the Right, said by main character Leslie Hiller, Written by Debra Hautzig.